The other day, I had a pretty interesting phone call with a friend of my husband’s. Much like myself and my husband, James* had a bit of a crisis. He, like many other creatives, felt like he was at a crossroads. He didn’t know whether or not he wanted to continue pursuing a career in his particular music genre.
I understand how it feels.
There’s a certain point in a creative career where you sit there, looking at all the STEM and business workers around you, and wonder, “Do I really want this crap? They’re the ones making all the money.”
I’ve been there. My husband has been there. The Red Hot Chili Peppers have been there when they wrote “Under the Bridge.” Vincent Van Gough and Jack Kerouac have also been there. It’s part of the artist life, unfortunately.
I’ll let you in on a secret other people won’t say: there are a lot of aspiring artists who have no business being a career artist. That may even be you. You might not really want to pursue a career in the arts. But, how can you tell what you really want?
I have a test for that.
Introducing the Fairy Godmother Test…
Here’s what I tell people who aren’t sure what they want to do in life: I tell them to try the Fairy Godmother Test. The Fairy Godmother Test is a simple three-part process: I ask them what their ideal day with work would be, why they want it, and if they would genuinely put up with more bad days than good to get that.
If a person can be very specific about the goals they have, where they want to live and work, and why they want that specific goal, they have a decent shot at that career because they’re focused enough to make it work. If they’re willing to deal with all the negative sides of the career, they want it enough to get it.
Here’s an example of what a Fairy Godmother Test looks like.
You might be wondering what this test would look like when I chat with people. It’s a lot simpler than you think. This is what it looks like in action with my friend James:
O: Tell me a day in your ideal career. I’m now your fairy godmother, I got a magic wand and will wave it to make you in that career.
J: I wanna be a music artist that’s really good and very popular in their genre.
O: Congratulations. You are now the world’s best and most popular polka player.
J: No, no, no. I want to be a DJ.
O: What genre? Do you want techno, house, dubstep…?
J: I guess hard techno and dubstep.
O: How many hours do you think you want to practice?
J: I don’t know?
O: If I told you that you had to practice eight hours a day, even when you’re bored as shit, would you still want to do both genres?
J: No, I don’t think I could do that with dubstep.
O: So you really prefer hard techno.
J: Yes.
O: Okay, well, the average hard techno DJ who has decent success makes about $80,000 a year at their peak. They have to do their own accounting and everything. You also will have to spend a large portion of your life away from home. Are you okay with that?
J: I don’t know, I think I’d miss my family.
O: Also, the average span of a hard techno DJ career is about five to 10 years. Do you have an exit strategy for that, if you had a good run and don’t want to do it anymore?
J: I don’t know.
O: Knowing all this and knowing how you’ve felt the industry treat you, do you really want to have that wish granted?
J: I…I think I have to think about this. Maybe it’s just a hobby.
The truth about choosing a career is not a pretty one.
Choosing a career is not a thing to do flippantly, especially when you’re considering a career in music, writing, art, modeling, or fashion. The reason why is simple: glittery careers rarely ever pay a living wage and the reality of what you’re signing up for isn’t as fun as it appears to be.
The world of creative arts is not just a matter of “make music, become famous,” nor was it ever truly the case. Being in the creative world, especially in the traditional routes of acting, pop stardom, or fashion modeling, is brutal.
Even “nuts and bolts” careers like medicine and STEM can be a total disaster if you choose one that’s not fit with your lifestyle. For example, many doctors call going to med school their “million-dollar mistake” because they get stuck in a career they hate with no choice but to work in it.
Here’s what I wish people would think about when they choose a career…
I want them to do a Fairy Godmother Test, and come up with a main career and a backup career. And here’s what I would ask them to write down.
#1: What does a typical work week look like for you in your dream career?
What are your work hours? Who hires you, if anyone? Who do you work with? What are you doing for work? Where do you live and how much are you making? Is this actually in line with what people in that field currently make, or are you pulling numbers out your behind.
What specific niche do you work in for your field? Do you actually like that niche enough to spend 40 years doing it, or are you just in it because it’s cool right now? Be very honest with yourself.
The point of this test is to determine whether what you want in your field is specific and realistic enough for it to make sense as a career. If you cannot put what you’re doing into words, it likely won’t be focused enough to do as a day-to-day thing.
#2: What does the average person in your chosen field do to keep their career going?
Did you research what it took to get the typical person in your field up and running? If not, you need to start doing this before you really commit to a career. I would go so far as to suggest looking at people who were spit up and chewed up by your industry before you do anything.
If you’re a creative person, did you approach it with a business plan? If you want to do something with STEM, law, or finance, are you willing to invest in going to school? Are you willing to get and keep licenses?
If you are looking for fame, are you willing to spend 20 hours or more a week on social media just so that you can get people to follow you and pay attention to you? If you are looking for a career in writing, are you willing to deal with ample rejections before you get to a yes?
I want you to think of the small things you can’t do if you join a certain career too.
For example, teachers are not allowed to post photos of themselves drinking on social media in many districts. Many schools are also filled with out-of-control, violent kids. Would you be willing to forgo edgy shoots on Insta for a career teaching kids who might go so far as to threaten you on a daily basis?
When you look at what you have to put in versus what you potentially receive, does that career make sense for you? Would you still want to work in that field knowing what dues you might have to pay at an average pace?
#3: What is your tap-out limit and your hobby limit?
A “tap out limit” is a moment where you say, “You know what? I don’t care if I *do* get granted this type of career after this. I don’t want to pursue this anymore.”
A “hobby limit” is a moment where you put your dream career on the backburner because you’re not sure how feasible it still is or you’re not sure how you feel about it. Many people who are in music will have a hobby limit that is age-related or childcare-related.
A hobby limit is also best paired with a backup plan. For example, a friend of mine told me, “If I am not a major music star in my field by this age, I’m going to treat it like a hobby and focus on being a good salesperson at my job.”
Remember: you can always return to a hobby, but you can’t always turn a hobby into a career. You need to know when you are willing to walk away.
You need to be your own Fairy Godmother if you want to have a very high-competition career.
Look, as much as I want to be a Fairy Godmother, I can’t be. I don’t have wings and I don’t have a tutu and I don’t have a wand. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t make the magic happen on your own.
The point of this test is to help you think out your next steps in your career, figure out how others made it happen, and figure out whether it’s even a career that you want to pursue as wholeheartedly as you need to in order to attain it.
So, if you’re lost. Ask your Fairy Godmother for help. She’s right there with you, in your mind.
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